my house in california is on one of those blocks famous for going "all out" for halloween. Like, kids from all over the bay area are bussed to MY BLOCK, which is blocked from car traffic by the police so that the swarms of sweaty infants can frolic from house to house begging for candy without fear of cars, for one, but also because the sidewalks simply can't contain the flow of little spooks and goblins.
Each of our neighbors have to "one up" each other with holiday decorations-- making haunted houses, dressing up as statues and startling people as they walk by, strobe lights, fake crime scenes, mangled mannequins in piles of red syrup-- it's impressive but also frankly symptomatic of the suburban nightmare.
And then there's us. We bought 65 bags of candy and just sat on our front steps drinking whiskey, pelting "fun size" snickers at pillowcases and little plastic buckets so they'd leave our house the fuck alone. We bought a pumpkin (didn't carve it) and a plastic gargoyle for the front of the house so as not to be a total disgrace to our neighborhood. Ha! Not likely.
2 comments:
my house in california is on one of those blocks famous for going "all out" for halloween. Like, kids from all over the bay area are bussed to MY BLOCK, which is blocked from car traffic by the police so that the swarms of sweaty infants can frolic from house to house begging for candy without fear of cars, for one, but also because the sidewalks simply can't contain the flow of little spooks and goblins.
Each of our neighbors have to "one up" each other with holiday decorations-- making haunted houses, dressing up as statues and startling people as they walk by, strobe lights, fake crime scenes, mangled mannequins in piles of red syrup-- it's impressive but also frankly symptomatic of the suburban nightmare.
And then there's us. We bought 65 bags of candy and just sat on our front steps drinking whiskey, pelting "fun size" snickers at pillowcases and little plastic buckets so they'd leave our house the fuck alone. We bought a pumpkin (didn't carve it) and a plastic gargoyle for the front of the house so as not to be a total disgrace to our neighborhood. Ha! Not likely.
That was my halloween.
"And then there's us." I need to hang out with your family more often.
Post a Comment